HILL VALLEY – A man believed to regularly travel through time uses his unique temporal abilities to measure how little food he can consume and other ways to have as little impact on the past, present, and future as possible,… Read More ›
#satire
Zoom call ‘glitch’ reveals alien invasion
INLAND EMPIRE — A suburban software engineer who claimed to have clocked in more than 1,500 virtual meetings since the shelter-in-place order began in March, provided evidence to the public during a live-streamed presentation on Friday that he believed showed… Read More ›
Robo cops to the rescue? City hall discusses police reform
CITY HALL – In the wake of George Floyd’s death and ongoing national protests demanding the end of police brutality, city leaders met this week to determine ways in which police might better protect and serve struggling black communities. The… Read More ›
‘Radical’ eyewear detects COVID-19, will ‘save’ America
SAN FRANCISCO – a popular brand of augmented eyewear may soon save lives, and the economy, through a filter that allows viewers to see the novel coronavirus in air and on surfaces, according to company developers. Representatives from Rocket &… Read More ›
As pandemic spreads, Space Force enlistment soars
CAMP PENDLETON – Leaders of the fledgling United States Space Force – which President Trump requested the military create in 2019 and millions of Americans considered a publicity ploy – announced today they have received ‘hundreds of thousands of inquiries’… Read More ›
‘Reopening America’ transforms political map blue
WASHINGTON – President Trump’s decision in March to lift national emergency status related to the novel coronavirus pandemic in order to revive the nation’s economy likely led to his loss of the 2020 election and a massive change in political… Read More ›
‘Cosmic shit-storm’ merges California, Texas into new state
AUSTIMENTO – The physical unification of two politically polarized states – California and Texas – has left scientists scrambling to understand what caused the anomaly as residents of the newly formed land mass struggle to coexist. Some consider it… Read More ›
Assault-style vehicles coming to a neighborhood near you
LOS ANGELES — Increases in incidents of road rage are transforming motorists into road warriors, so claims a local company with plans to fuel the trend by offering the first weaponized automobiles available for consumers. Representatives from Rocket & Gamble,… Read More ›
A.I.-inspired ‘family feud’ goes to Supreme Court
NEWPORT BEACH – Arguments related to a couple whose marriage devolved online thanks to cyber attacks they sponsored against each other is being heard by the most judicious minds in the nation, even as details related to the husband and… Read More ›
‘Mother’ Earth has same rights as corporations, judge rules
SAN FRANCISCO – In a landmark case, a federal court decided today that the third planet from the sun has the same legal protections as the corporations that profit off it. The plaintiffs in the case – a group of… Read More ›
